What It’s Like Growing Up in a Military Family

It’s no secret that growing up in a military family is a unique experience that shapes children’s lives in profound ways. As of 2023, there were approximately 1.6 million military children in the U.S. Each military child, misleadingly but affectionately nicknamed “military brat,” faces a distinct set of challenges stemming from their parents’ service, particularly when that service results in the ultimate sacrifice. 

To offer a salute to the military family as one of the most indispensable kinds of American families, it’s essential to learn about the complexities of their lives. Doing so allows us to create and improve targeted areas of assistance, such as college scholarships.

The Unique Elements of a Military Childhood

Frequent Moves and Major Adjustments

One of the most notable aspects of being a military child is the regular relocation that comes with a parent’s deployment or reassignment. On average, military families move every two to three years, which means children must constantly adapt to new schools, communities, and friends.

Parent Deployment

Deployment is another significant factor in the lives of military children. The frequent absence of at least one parent — and sometimes two — when they go to various locations away from their military base can create considerable uncertainty in a child’s life. This can intensify if one or both parents are deployed abroad, especially if they are sent to a part of the world experiencing violent political or military conflicts.

The Major Challenges of Growing Up in a Military Family

Life in a military family comes with significant challenges that can impact children’s emotional and mental well-being. 

Constant Relocations and Disruptions

Being constantly on the move means kids are continually having to adjust to new environments, schools, and communities. The need to repeatedly say goodbye to friends and start anew can be emotionally taxing and lead to difficulties in forming lasting relationships. It can also make it difficult for children to focus on learning.

Strain on Mental Health

Military children often grapple with emotional strain related to their parent’s deployments and the inherent uncertainties of military life. Children impacted by what is known as military family syndrome may experience stress-related symptoms, including:

• Anxiety

• Depression

• Sleeping problems

• Behavioral issues

• Loneliness and isolation

• Poor academic performance

• Engagement in risky behaviors (especially tweens and teens)

Unfortunately, the effects of military deployment on early childhood development in particular can be quite severe. Very young children who face separation from their deployed parents can experience:

• Fear

• Loss of appetite

• Sleeping problems

• Behavioral issues

• Developmental challenges

• Physical discomfort

Coping With Loss and Grief 

For children who have lost a parent in the line of duty, the challenges are even more profound. Grieving the loss of a military parent is a complex process that can involve anger, confusion, and a sense of abandonment. Mental health resources targeted toward helping children cope with the trauma of loss are essential. Even seemingly unrelated forms of support, such as college scholarship funds set up at an early age, can help kids focus on their futures as they recover.

Advantages

Growing up in a military family presents its share of difficulties, but it also offers numerous benefits that can shape children’s lives in positive ways. Military children often develop unique strengths and skills that can benefit them throughout their lives, including:

• A strong sense of community. Military families typically form close-knit relationships with one another, creating a supportive network that helps children feel connected despite frequent moves. These friendships can provide stability and emotional support during times of transition, fostering lifelong bonds.

• Adaptability and resilience. Military kids learn to navigate change early on in life. They often develop strong problem-solving skills and the ability to face challenges head-on, equipping them to handle various life situations with confidence and grace. This is useful in many situations, such as adjusting to college life.

• Respect for diverse perspectives and experiences. Military families are often exposed to different cultures and lifestyles, especially if they are stationed abroad. This helps military children appreciate diversity and understand different perspectives, which can enhance their social skills and cultural competency.

• Sense of purpose and patriotic values. As a result of their parents’ service, military children often develop a heightened sense of patriotism, respect for authority, and a commitment to community service. These values can guide their future decisions and help them contribute positively to society wherever they go.

Growing up in a military family presents a unique set of challenges that can significantly impact children’s lives. However, through strong support systems and their innate resilience, military children can find ways amid sometimes difficult circumstances. 

As the citizens who benefit from their sacrifices, it’s vital to understand and support military families, ensuring they have access to the resources and assistance they need to navigate the unique challenges they face. By doing so, we can honor the sacrifices made by military parents and the children who carry their legacy forward.

Support Scholarships for Marine Corps Families With MC-LEF

Since its creation in 1995, the Marine Corps-Law Enforcement Foundation (MC-LEF) has offered educational funding to the children of fallen military service members. Thanks to our generous donors, MC-LEF currently establishes a $35,000 educational account for every child who loses a parent serving on active duty as a federal law enforcement agent, in the United States Marine Corps, or as a Navy Corpsman. To date, MC-LEF has awarded over $93 million in educational accounts and other humanitarian assistance to over 5,900 recipients. Contact us to learn more!

All MC-LEF officers and board members are volunteers; we have only one paid employee. We pride ourselves on running our organization as cost-effectively as possible so that the vast majority of our donor funds can be used to accomplish our mission of educating the children of those who sacrificed all. Please consider donating today!